060: Musings

[livingmyths]

I did everything the deities wanted. I hope they'll let us be for a little while.

Tony... doesn't remember me and that's really really hard and makes me very sad.

But the sun is shining and the birds are out and three deer were in my front yard this morning to remind me of how beautiful things are.

I usually go into the Library at least for a while, but today I think I'm just going to sit in the sun at the front of my house and watch the animals and read a book and have tea. That will make me feel better.

Comments

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

Common sense I think I have in plentiful amounts. Living in harmony comes with more difficulty.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Maybe it's 'cause my brain doesn't always work right. Maybe that's why it's easier for me.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

'Doesn't always work right'? Do you mean to say that you're mad?

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

I... get confused sometimes about what's real and what isn't.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

I can imagine that would make things difficult for you, to say the least. What a strange way to go through the world.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Especially here where some of the things I knew weren't real, are.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

Some of the things I knew weren't real are real here, but I think my trouble with that is far different from yours.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

I love it here though.

I've never been so happy.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

I think you're the first person I've met in my two years here who's actually happy to be here.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

It's so much better than anywhere I've ever been.

And I've been a lot of places.

Except... the rez was nice. I liked it there. But my dad wouldn't let me stay.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

If you say the City is better, I hate to imagine where else you might have lived.

It just seems so surprising to meet someone who's actually happy to be here.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Mostly on the streets. Of a lot of different cities.

I hear that a lot, but it's true.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry to hear that.

Perhaps it's good for those of us who are as jaded as I am to meet you.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

It is what it is. I'm here now.

Well, I'm happy to meet you.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

And likewise, you, though I don't even know your name--at least, not yet.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Oh gosh, I'm sorry! My name is Rain.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

Cain Hargreaves. It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Rain. And your name seems to fit the way you live out in the forests.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

It's nice to meet you, too.

Sometimes I change it for a while, but I always come back to Rain.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

Why 'Rain', though? Do you like the rain, perhaps?

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

When I was on the rez I went on a vision quest - crying for a name, you know?

And Rain was the name I got.

I didn't realize it at first. When I went up the mountain it started raining and I stayed out in it praying and praying for a sign. Three days and all it did was pour - no sign, no animal, not anything. And when I finally went back my dad was there and he dragged me away in the car, still all soaking wet and crying because the ancestors hadn't heard me, all they sent was rain, rain, rain. And then I realized that was my sign.

And that was my name.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

I see.

I wish I'd been able to choose my own name.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

You don't like it?

You could go on your own vision quest.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

It wouldn't change a thing--

I could, but where I come from, we don't really believe in vision quests or having one's ancestors give one a name.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Most people don't where I'm from either.

Except on the rez. But I couldn't stay there.

[misterblackbird.livejournal.com]

You keep saying 'the rez'. You'll have to forgive me, but what does that mean?