011: Embarrassed

[livingmyths]

I'm feeling really pretty foolish today, but, judging from the other things I saw, at least I wasn't the only one and I was luckier than some people.

Abby, thank you for taking such good care of me. And please forget everything I said about - well, about practically everything.


Mr. Stark, I'm really sorry I didn't show up to work yesterday. I know it was supposed to be my first day and all, but I... really wasn't myself. I'm at the library right now, but if you still want me I can come today.


Anybody else, well, I'm kind of gonna be working in the most out-of-the-way places I can in the library.


And is it really true that Ianto's gone? He was so nice to me. I'm gonna really, really miss him, if it's true.

Comments

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

That's the great thing about smiling.

Well, you don't have to worry. I won't tell anyone else.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

It is, isn't it? I love to see other people smile or make them smile. I don't even care too much if the people are actually laughing at me.

Thank you. Because... it's stupid. And silly.

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

Exactly! Though, sometimes it sucks when they're laughing at you. But that's okay!

No it's not.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Only if they're really mean about it. But it's okay, I'm used to that too and it isn't so bad after a while.

Oh, it is. I'm just Rain and, well... It's just stupid to even dream a little bit.

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

You've had a tough life.

What do you dream about, Ocean?

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

It's just... life.

What do I dream...

Sometimes I dream I'm normal. Just like everybody else and not scared of all sorts of stupid things. And I have a little house that I'm not afraid to stay in - even if I'm alone - and all the books I want and... Sometimes, when I'm really daring, I dream that I have someone who really loves me and wants to be with me always or even just for a while, but he's really nice to me and good.

See? Silly. Things I don't get to have. Except the books kind of, because when I work here I kind of pretend they're mine and the library doesn't seem to mind at all.

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

Those are really nice dreams. Not silly at all, Ocean.

I bet you'll find someone really nice for you.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Maybe.

I'm kind of almost living in a dream world now anyway, right?

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

Yep!

It's kind of fun isn't it?

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it is.

Everyone is so nice to me here.

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

There are a lot of nice people to talk to! And be friends with!

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

I am pretty happy here. And most people don't seem to mind so much that I'm weird.

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

That's because you're not weird. At all.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Wait till I start answering your questions before you ask them!

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

That'll be so cool.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

You always surprise me, Abby!

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

Well, no one has ever read my mind before that I know of!

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

I don't really read minds, I just... I can hear what people are thinking sometimes. Or kind of know what they're going to do next sometimes.

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

Really? That's still really cool

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Most people didn't think so.

Except on the streets sometimes.

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

Most people don't think that gothic stuff is great either. So I just think they don't know what they're missing.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Gothic stuff?

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

Like the stuff I wear.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Oh.

I think it looks very nice on you. You're very pretty.

[caf-pow-girl.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I'm glad you think so!