024: No Blood?

[livingmyths]

I'm cursed today, I know I am, I can feel it.

But I have no blood on me. I was sure I would.

...

I don't understand.

I... it makes my head hurt to try and think about it.

I'm going up to the roof of the Library. Maybe the wind and the sun will make my head feel better.

Comments

[notrlyjesus.livejournal.com]

You can feel if you're cursed?

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Yeah. It's... it's sort of a funny buzzy feeling way way back in my head.

[notrlyjesus.livejournal.com]

Creepy. I'm not sure if having that added would help me with the curses, or make them worse.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

I guess I don't think about it much except for something like this, but... I guess it helps me know what's real.

I can't always tell - not when it makes us be someone else.

[notrlyjesus.livejournal.com]

Heh. Well, it's real. Definitely. Annoying, too.

.... I can see how that'd work. You wouldn't have your ability to tell if you weren't you, right?

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Then you have blood on you?


I think that's why. It makes sense at least

[notrlyjesus.livejournal.com]

Yes.

I wonder if on days you switch powers the person that gets yours will be able to tell they're cursed. I'll have to find them if that curse comes back around, just to ask.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry.

Oh, I don't know if I have powers exactly. It's not like I'm special like some of the people here. Just... sometimes I can hear what people are thinking and sometimes I know what's going to happen.

[beast-unbound.livejournal.com]

Perhaps whatever you thought you did, was not your fault at all.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

My dad always says it was.

And there were lots of people I couldn't save.

But... maybe?

[beast-unbound.livejournal.com]

It seems like everyone in the City has one of the two burdens: killing, or failing to prevent death.

A strange thing, the tendency of this place to draw them in.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Yeah.

But most of them here seem so nice.

At least they've most all been really nice to me.

[beast-unbound.livejournal.com]

Just because someone has killed a person doesn't mean it was for a bad reason, or that they're a bad person now, or were then.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

I know.

Everyone has their dark things.

[charmedillusion.livejournal.com]

Do you need any company at the library, Rain? Or would you rather have some time to yourself?

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't mind company if you wanted to come see me.

My head's a little everywhere though.

[charmedillusion.livejournal.com]

I'd like that.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Well, I'm here. I'm on the roof, but I can come meet you downstairs if you don't like heights.

[morethanasuit.livejournal.com]

How are you feeling, Rain?

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

My head hurts.

[morethanasuit.livejournal.com]

From thinking about what this means?

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

Yeah. It's...

I get all confused and turned around.

I don't know what to think. I know you've said it before but... I just...

I don't know. It hurts.

[morethanasuit.livejournal.com]

I think it just means you don't have blood on your hands, Rain.

[livingmyths.livejournal.com]

I...

I don't know what to do with that.

It's... I get so mixed up sometimes in my head. And I find me again by going over what I know is true. And that's one of the things I know - that says who and what I am and shows me where I am.

And if it's not, then I don't know where I am or who I am or what to do and I don't know what's real anymore.

I feel like I'm falling and I'm out of control and I just get so scared...

[morethanasuit.livejournal.com]

You're still you, Rain. Just something you thought was true, isn't. And it's a good thing that it's not true.